Who Are the Second Wives and Partners? What Can You Do?

We are women (and their partners) who believe that the alimony laws in the state of South Carolina are outdated, specifically the awarding of permanent alimony as the most common form of alimony awarded. Many of us have been directly harmed by these laws. We may actually be the ones paying our spouse's alimony, because he has suffered a financial downturn. We may not be able to retire, along with our spouse, because our husbands owe their ex-wives so much in alimony each month that retirement is impossible. We may be struggling to put children through college, perhaps step-children whose mother is receiving the money in alimony that should be going toward the childrens' college education. The ways in which the old laws are one-sided are endless. Even short marriages can result in permanent alimony.

Our goal is to educate the public and our legislators concerning the inequities the old laws have created. We no longer live in a society where the majority of women stay home with their children while their husbands work. What the old laws have created is a system wherein there is no incentive for women receiving permanent alimony, many of whom are college-educated and have had good paying jobs in the past, to work or to look for new, long-term relationships. They often remain mired in the past, financially  and emotionally, which also damages their children. Many of these men have become walking annuities; the pressure is tremendous. We believe that temporary alimony has its place, but permanent alimony in this day and age is inequitable.

Over the last few months, just about every day, one or several new members have joined the 2nd Wives Club. SC Alimony Reform (which has hundreds of members!) has been very busy this winter and into the spring--meeting with Senators and Representatives; putting up billboards; recording radio and television ads; writing hardship stories of members who have suffered terribly under South Carolina's archaic alimony laws and getting these stories to the media; working with a lobbyist; writing letters to editors; doing television, newspaper, and radio interviews; and donating to fund the advertising when we can. SC Alimony Reform bumper stickers have become more and more visible. Perhaps you, too, have been involved in these efforts!

Help us bring South Carolina's alimony laws up-to-date. We have introduced bill H-3215, which calls for a task force to create new and equitable laws. Call and write your legislators (specifically the senators below), and ask them to support bill H-3215. Good law should be able to protect the interests of all sides within reason. Help us make South Carolina a state where people don't think twice about getting married. 

Bill H-3215 has already passed in the House. Please use the link below to contact senators on the Senate Judiciary Committee, asking them to support the bill, so that it will move to a vote in the Senate next. The link allows you to send an email to all members of the Senate Judiciary Committee at once. 

http://www.scstatehouse.gov/committee.php?chamber=S#jud

Thank you for your time and continued efforts!

We Are Growing Like Crazy!

It is so exciting to be in contact with so many new members of the 2nd Wives and Partners Club! Since South Carolina Alimony Reform has become more visible to the public through billboards, articles in The State Newspaper, radio ads, and interviews by Fox News in Greenville and WISTV in Columbia, the word is getting out. You and your partner do not have to suffer under the burden of permanent alimony alone. And, the laws can be changed!

We have had several fruitful meetings with senators and representatives in the last few weeks, explaining the impact of the antiquated alimony laws on South Carolina families today. Very few people are aware that permanent alimony is the most common form of alimony awarded in this state, often even when the marriage lasted less than ten years and the individuals have a lifetime ahead of them. The lawmakers we approached agree that it is time to take a look at the old laws on the books in the context of the modern economy.

So many have asked me--what can I do? There are several things:

1) Write your the legislators (senator and representative) from your district a letter or email, explaining how the laws are hurting you and your family and how you would like to see the law changed. Ask them for their help and support on this matter. Specifically, South Carolina Alimony Reform has proposed a bill, filed by Jerry Govan, calling for the formation of a task force to revise the old laws. Ask your legislators to support this bill.

2) Write your local paper. An editorial or opinion piece lets the public know what the current law is (most people don't believe you when you say permanent means forever) and how you would like to see it changed. This will let others in the same boat know they are not alone.

3) Comment on this blog--let your story speak for itself. Let your voice be heard.

We can get the laws changed in this state. The 2nd Wives have been instrumental in other states, helping the public to see that both women and men are negatively impacted by old laws that no longer reflect the economic reality of modern families.

Welcome new members! We know the laws can be changed, because it has been done in other states, and Florida and New Jersey are in the midst of reform initiatives as well. There is a real sense of momentum. Thank you for your support!