Are you a second wife or partner? Most of us have stumbled across stories of women (usually women, but sometimes men) who are either making their spouse's alimony payment or choosing not to marry their partner because they know their finances will then become linked to their new spouses's and alimony will become their burden. I remember thinking--how awful! How outrageous! How can the laws be so inequitable? Really? And then one day, I woke up and found that I was that second wife! I am paying my husband's ex-wife's alimony and barely making ends meet. To be honest, the ends are not meeting, and we have three teenagers headed toward college.
Share your story with an audience who understands! Are you working and your husband's ex-wife is not? Have you decided not to marry the person you love, so that your finances don't become entangled with his or her alimony payments? There are worse stories out there than mine.
We want to hear your voice! In other states like Massachusetts, the Second Wives Club created a significant push to bring reform to egregious, antiquated alimony laws. We can do the same! Let's get the conversation rolling. . .
I had no idea when I married my husband that my assets could be taken into consideration concerning the alimony he is required to pay. What's worse is that his attorney told him that my assets could not be considered. It turns out that his attorney, who has been practicing for 30 years, has been wrong about a few things. My husband didn't put his retirement information on the financial declaration for a hearing because his attorney told him not to but when we got to court he was ordered to report it. It turns out that even though she has more assets than he does now he is expected to take money from his retirement account to pay her alimony. I believe the attorney told us what he believed to be true but since there are no clear guide lines the judge can do whatever they want. And they do.
ReplyDeleteSadly these posts are a year old. Where has the outrage from 2nd wives gone? I just donated to the law reform. Have you? I'm sick of the entitlement attitude of the ex. She won't work, won't marry, won't stop shopping, going bankrupt, buying buying buying.........
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous,
ReplyDeleteI can appreciate your general frustration but not your frustration with the 2nd Wives. While the post you chose to respond to is older, our latest post (if you scroll to the top of the blog, you will see it) is from February of this year. Since February, we have been meeting with senators and representatives, showing up for hearings. doing newspaper and television interviews, putting up billboards, recording radio and television ads, responding to inquiries like yours. engaging a lobbyist, writing editorials for papers, and donating money. I wouldn't be surprised if I have forgotten something, we've been so busy. The Second Wives Club is 10 times the size it was one year ago! I am here to say that the outrage is alive and well (fueled by the inequity the current law creates), and I don't know whatever gave you a different idea. Please support the 2nd Wives, as we support SC Alimony Reform!